You might be a philosophy major if...

There's over a dozen responses to this question at Philosophy@UtahState. My contribution:

You’ve flamed a discussion thread by saying:

"Your position has the following two features:

"1) It’s false

"2) (1) is sufficiently clear that the fact that you hold your position is evidence of mental deficiency on your part."

This is actually loosely based on something a professor once said in class (referring to Leibniz's view of Spinoza, not the prof's view of anything).